Experts Share Their Secrets to Writing a Wedding Officiant Script

You made it to the point on your wedding planning checklist where it's time to finalize the wedding officiant script. Way to go! With tasks like picking a venue, deciding on flowers and booking a stationer for your programs out of the way, it's time to tackle plans for your officiant's wedding script. Read on for what you need to consider when it comes to crafting the script for officiating a wedding.

Whether you decide to go with a religious leader, a close family member, or a friend who loves a public speaking moment, developing the wedding officiator script is typically a collaborative effort. A couple may work with the officiant to decide on milestones and memories they'd like to touch on or they'll discuss specific literary or religious references to weave into the officiant speech. The officiant will tailor their script to speak to the couple's personality, the vibe of the wedding, and the traditions that are most important to them. While officiant script for a wedding is often a short and sweet speech, there's so much power in just a few words, particularly as they usher a couple into a new life together.

If you need to find your perfect officiant, head over to The Knot Vendor Marketplace. You enter your location and then filter by different ceremony types (civil union, religious or nonreligious, interfaith, etc,) or religious affiliations. You can also filter by different wedding events for all types of wedding officiants. Ready to start thinking about one of the most meaningful parts of your big day and mulling over wedding officiant script ideas? Here's how the professionals work with couples to come up with the perfect wedding speech for the officiant.

In this article: How to Write a Wedding Officiant Script | Wedding Officiant Script Examples

How to Write a Wedding Officiant Script

The script for officiating a wedding is just one component of the overall wedding ceremony script. However, the meaningful wedding script for your officiant that will kick off your next chapter should be written with care. Thankfully, the experts have it down to both an art and a science. Here are the steps officiants take to write scripts for their couples.

Consider the Desired Vibe

Part of knowing how to officiate a wedding successfully is understanding that every wedding is different. Some are serious, some are lighthearted. Some find the perfect balance between funny and sweet. And the script for officiating a wedding should match the overall feeling of the entire day.

Christopher Shelley, wedding celebrant at Illuminating Ceremonies, recommends discussing the wedding vibe the couple would like. They may want a formal, traditional ambience and wedding ceremony order or they might want to keep guests laughing through an unconventional take on vows. Whatever their preference, this should be the foundation for your script.

And, as an officiant, he says to other would-be officiants, "Did they choose you because you're funny? Did they choose you because you have a great voice?" The characteristics they looked for in you most likely reflect the overall tone they'd like for the wedding.

Talk About Traditions

Some couples would like to follow a traditional wedding officiant script nearly word-for-word. Others may want to incorporate a specific religious tradition or historic ring exchange wording. Whether or not you're familiar with those traditions, getting up to speed on the meaning and the words will add a sentimental touch to the officiant's ceremony speech.

"I like to ask whether there are any cultural, spiritual, or modern rituals or readings they want to include. A few common ones I see are unity candle lightings, personalized blessings, or readings from poetry, rom-coms, or even favorite song lyrics," says Steven Greitzer, CEO and founder at Provenance.

Get to Know the Couple

Since there are a lot of different people who can officiate a wedding, there's a good chance that the officiant and couple don't know each other well…yet! Just as there are interview questions for potential officiants, the officiant will also want to interview the couple. There are some questions officiants may ask you that you should be prepared to answer.

"Approach the script writing first with heart and story. Instead of diving straight into structure, ask the couple a lot of questions, not just about their timeline, but about things that matter to them," says Elizabeth Babinski, founder and officiant at Liz Rae Weddings. She suggests asking about everything from big picture questions about values to the nuances of their day-to-day routines together and what they like to do when they hang out.

Babinski explains, "That's the best way to tell the couple's story in a way that truly encapsulates them and what to actually include in the ceremony. For example, there's no reason to add a wedding reading if the couple is not into literature or reading."

She says that getting to know the couple on a deeper level (even if you already know them!) is what adds depth and meaning to a ceremony script. "When a couple tells a story, they should ask more questions about that story. For example, how did they feel in that moment? Why was that moment funny? Sad? How did it bring them together?"

Focus On the Couple

When an officiant is given a mic for their speech, it's tempting to turn it into a one-person show, but keep the focus on the couple at all times. Shelley explains, "Make sure the ceremony is about them, not you. They may know you, and many people present may know you, but that doesn't mean it's about you. In the third person, telling their story with absolute conviction."

He says that, in that moment, everyone is there to celebrate their relationship, and you are serving as the authority on their relationship. "You are not up there to show off how special you are because you know them or are related to them. You are up there as the best communicator of their love story," says Shelley.

Keep It Short and Sweet

It's rare that a couple would want their ceremony to drag on—and guests definitely want to get to the party, so keep it short and sweet. Franklin says, "Much like with speeches, the number one mission is to do no harm, which means nothing embarrassing. Keep it to twenty to twenty-five minutes, including their personalized vows, and make sure you have all of the requisite elements."

Wedding Officiant Script Examples

As you're beginning to think about your wedding officiant speech, here are a few templates to get you started. These will be personalized to your unique love story by the officiant, but the foundation can come from these simple but impactful words.

Nontraditional Wedding Officiant Speech

Whether you're going for a non-religious wedding or you simply want to embrace your quirkier side, there are ways to weave that non-traditional approach into your wedding officiant language. This is the type of script that should reflect your individuality, but it can follow this basic format.

Good evening friends and family. We've come together today to celebrate the unique love story of two of our favorite people, [name] and [name].

These two have made the decision to come together not out of obligation, but because they've chosen to walk together in this life. They are beloved by each of you for their joy and authenticity, and we can all agree that, in a world with so many wonderful people, these two are a perfect match.

We've all witnessed their commitment to each other over the years, now we'll make it official through the exchange of vows.

Inspiring Wedding Officiant Speech

If you are a couple that's been through a lot in your time together, you might want your wedding ceremony to speak to your longstanding commitment and the work you've put in throughout the years. This example of a wedding officiant's speech acknowledges how strong you've become as a couple.

Good evening friends and family. We've come together today to celebrate the love story of [name] and [name], a couple whose commitment to each other has overcome ups, downs, and challenges throughout the years. They've always walked forward together, emerging stronger month-after-month and year-after-year.

These two have made the decision to spend their lives together. They have continued to choose each other, working diligently to write each chapter of their lives with each other at the center.

Each of us here has been inspired by their unconditional and breakable bond, and now we'll make it official through the exchange of vows.

Simple Wedding Officiant Speech

Everyone loves a short and sweet wedding ceremony. This basic wedding officiant script template is the bare bones version of an officiant speech, hitting the necessities and highlights without getting too into the weeds.

Good evening friends and family. We've come together today to celebrate the love story of [name] and [name].

These two have made the decision to come together not out of obligation, but because they've chosen to walk together in this life.

We've each witnessed their commitment to each other over the years, now we'll make it official through the exchange of vows.